When first I laid eyes on him,
knew that I'd be his wife in this life
and needed only to sit back and watch as
seconds turned into minutes
that made up our forever for as long
as life was blessed upon his body...
he that could see and love still
all of me
flawed, fucked up, and not always all
that I could be...from that first time
that ever we did meet
I got to come face to face with a man
that loved me from the top of my head
to the bottom of my feet
and all points in between
until the curtain was drawn on our love scene
he stayed down with the team
and his love can be found in
every intention behind everything I
ever said or do that I really mean

In his absence he held me and wiped tears
said that he understood why I wouldn't then
but there is nothing now left to fear
I said I may lose you too
and look what the devil do
before I could say I do
he too was taken
still not a love that I ever knew
to be forsaken
not when he I know how much he
longed to just be near me
even if I didn't see in us what he could see
because the blur of jaded emotions
made me fearful to believe in eternity
he stayed down with me
broken probably all he saw was
everything he thought a woman
is supposed to be
and said so what if this ain't easy
all I ask is that you return the love to me
and that is how we were
until he ceased to be...

2 down and I'm so far beyond numb
I didn't think anything else could make me feel again
much less be moved to say I love you and
it not be in vain
but he came
far from beautiful on the outside
still perfect in spirit
his heart spoke a language that
my soul could comprehend
and I meant it when I said it again
he was nothing like those other 2 men
still he was everything in my heart
that had ever been felt as a result of them
and I am again beautiful and brilliant
not over shadowed by one more than the other
he reminded me of everything sacred to me
from my husband to my mother
but turns out he wasn't meant to be my lover
and he stands in the spot still
as one that I love more than I thought possible
proving that my heart can feel again
is not impossible
and is now still living to show
how friendship can exceed expectations of more
and bless you with more than
ever imagined to be in store
teaching me in his own way - that I can be whole again
and there is nothing to fear anymore...

Opening the door to my belief in him
that combined doesn't come close to anything
like any of the 3 of them
no dopeboy swagga or past run in's with the law
still he might just be the most mesmorizing thing
that this woman ever saw
and the two sides of me can see
us in his arms melting like it's the first time
everytime under the influence of his charm
wanting only to reward him with a son
that embodies all my real talents
polishing the tarnish over everything else
that I may have done
shining through as she that still
could be the one
to show him eternity
if in fact this that I embark on now
is truly what god has in store for me
tell him I love him
for all that he didn't expect me to be
and everything else he took the time to see
and who I am now is the culmination
of the experience of those 3
truly believing inside my heart
that that trinity made it possible
to offer nothing bu the best of me
and I love him like them
and it be but a matter of time
before he too can see
than this may just be destiny
and even if he doesn't feel the same way
I love him for what he too
has taught, proven, and given to me

an image to reflect myself back to me
and the chance to once again see myself
beautifully